DOPAMINE

...that we eat affection
and live in depression.

We live
our lives in a cubicle
and the gods
of this planet
reward us
with affection and depression.

©The Bestowed

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I have spoken to these walls
They tell me of the devil -
 his secrets and powers...
They say the devil is a man
A man inside a man,
That man is a devil
His own devil.
He calls evil, devil
He calls devil, evil
He is the Devil - you are the d(evil), or not.

©The Bestowed

the voices.
success. a valley.
in our heads.

we live in our heads
and sleep in our minds
after several lampoons
of drowsy imaginations.

we dream in our heads
and sleep with our feet
after several dunks
fascinating our thoughts.

the dreams.
success. an ocean.
in our heads.

we dream on.
to live;
our greatest challenge.

©The Bestowed

THE END

you wear pain in solitude
and come out wearing
 a cap of happiness.

you act comedy on stage
but you are a tragic hero
acting a misdirected role.

you know they know,
the foolish and the wise ones alike
that acting is what you do
and at the end of the play
your back is to the ground
your body, beneath the ground,
and your tiny brain, for happy insects.

©The Bestowed

At some point
We forget where we are
The world smiles at us
And we smile back.

An old man once said
"When a child gets a glimpse of heaven
He forgets there are better heavens.
And just like his forefathers
He shall forget to die
Before his death."

©The Bestowed

my friend is a sage
and I am not.
he tells me stories of destruction
and I sing to him the pleasures in destruction,
he talks of God
and I ask of the devil,
he writes of love
and I speak of envy.
my friend is a dreamer; a believer
I am a thinker; a conceiver.

my friend adores saints
and I don't believe they exist.
my friend hates evildoers
and I think they matter.

this world isn't for saints
or evildoers;
sanity is for those
in between.

©The Bestowed

UNDERSTANDING THE BASIC CONCEPTS OF LOVE AND MARRIAGE

One of the most important reasons we have so many broken homes is simply because people do not understand the basic concepts of love and marriage.
Love however defined is an emotion, a feeling, so, as such, it is essential to know that it'd go up and down however strong. Thus, married couples most times, take love to be the most important aspect of their marriage, that if they feel a love lag, they get uncomfortable and begin to search for what is not lost. To not love your husband or wife like at the beginning of your marriage is normal. It is simply the nature of man. Understand this and constantly work on pleasing each other. With time, the love would return. It is this stage most married couples fall out and in turn divorce, saying "I don't love my wife/husband again because of this and that, bla bla bla". If there are no big issues, this is normal, it just has to be understood.
Marriage on the other side is a marital adventure by two individuals, so, as such, there is a need for a marriage plan. The lack of a proper marriage plan is like building a house on a shady foundation, it'd one day collapse. Marriage plan is needed to properly gauge the individual's wants, needs and personality and to properly assess the future foresight of the people planning to get married. If their plan isn't aligning, and they see they can't compromise, they'd better let things go while it hurts less.  At times, people overlook some things saying they'd work it out after marriage, saying he or she will change. Most times, things don't really change. Especially people's character or personality.

Thus, the crux is, there is need for a proper assessment and practical foresight estimation before marriage. And there is also a need for proper understanding of concepts such as love and marriage for a blissful married life.

#marriage #love #home #consult #happiness #success #love #emotions #divorce #peace #loving #inspiration #consulting #company #startup #agency #counsellor #bliss #nigeria #kano #lagos #abuja

Image credit : newyorker.com

MARRIAGE: THE ROLE OF PARENTING


The focal point of marriage beyond loving one's spouse is parenting. Parenting is one of the greatest tasks married couples face. Raising children to become adults. 
Let's fast forward, why do we have more broken men and women? Why do we have more cold hearted men and women? The answer is simple, Parenting. Parents need to understand that the greatest influencers of children are usually the parents. Although, there are other influencers, like peer pressure, the society and now, social media etc.

Nonetheless, it is what you mould a child to be that he/she will become. It is the kind of love you show someone they will exude in return. It is that simple. 
So while these kids are growing up, have time for them, play with them, scold them, empower them, uplift them, so when they become adults, you'd be at peace. 

That the mother understands that the affective core of her child is for her to embody with love, affection, care, and wonderful fecundities of humanity. 
That the father understands that the uprightness of his child is for him to embody with great insights that'd help carve the child into a well balanced child. 
The role of the parents can never be overemphasized.  That parents constantly check themselves about their roles as parents and to practically work on their children's weaknesses and make firm, their strengths. That they train their children as one. This is essential; this is vital. 

#parenting #marriage #kids #children #happiness #failures #emotions #love #raising #upbringing #family #lovers #TheHomeConsult #THC #inspiration #happiness #peace #greatness #weakness #firm #feelings #Nigeria

Photo credit : blog.honest.com

MARRIAGE: HOW TO KEEP YOUR LOVE AGLOW

That love fades is a certainty. For emotions and feelings are that way. It is inherent in man's nature to not constantly appreciate what he already has. So, how do you balance nature to elevate nurture? Often times, in marriages, couples complain about how the love they have for their partner has waned. 

This is not a big deal if it is perfectly handled. There is one simple formula for couples going through this. It is that, our love increases for a person that constantly tries to please us or someone that constantly makes us happy. Thus, this is the way out. Always please your partner. 

The problem stems from couples not being creative, and maybe forgetting that their marriage is their number one priority and it is something you have to always work on lest, you fall out of it. 
So, if the love is waning, let your spouse know that you want him/her to show more care for you, or better still you exude that love you so need to your partner. Love him or her tirelessly. Doing this would now make the love a part of your being, that even when your heart isn't feeling the love, your actions are saying otherwise. And this is the strongest of love.

#love #marriage #home #bliss #consultant #eternity #fun #life #live #heal #learn #understand #future #togetherness #mother #father #family #nigeria #canada #uk #thehomeconsult #growing #happiness #inspiration #motivation #flowers #organisation #win #team #one #love

Everything has a story,
Life has its story
That at the end
Everything would be alright, is a myth.
Life is not a destination
It is a journey
And death is its end.

A day, at a time.
Happiness comes
Sadness goes
Sadness comes
Happiness goes.

As sadness is a tragedy
Happiness is a comic relief
So, take it as it comes
And enjoy it while it lasts.

TRUTH

The truth is
the knife that gores
the heart 
or a blade that opens
the eye. 
The truth is a 
force that kills 
or a medicine that heals. 
The truth is a 
ladder towards the heavens
or a canal towards hell. 
The truth is a 
love that lasts
or a lust that persists. 
The truth is a dosage 
of immortality 
or a road towards mortality. 
The truth is 
however it is taken; 
The truth is that which brings relief
The truth is that which brigs grief. 

©The Bestowed 

THE EFFECTS OF SOCIAL MEDIA

The effects of social media in our lives, marriages and homes can never be overemphasized. In fact, social media is one of the main causes of divorce nowadays. 
We are now addicted to our phones. The phone is literally now our number one best friend. The phone could be helpful, aiding our day to day lives but it could also be extremely dangerous and could in turn, affect our relationship with people that are most important in our lives.

One way to balance one's use of social media is to first highlight ones use of it, that is, to know what we use it for. If it's not totally productive, then its use needs to be maximally reduced. 
Another crucial fact for married couples is to always be careful and watchful about who they chat with, and other things they give room for. Exchanging chats with people we don't really know and even people we know can go a long way to cause a dent to one's marriage. 
For parents, what your children post and do on social media should be your concern as this could be detrimental to their lives. At what age is it right for them to have cell phones? How do you enlighten them about morality and how well they should try as much as possible to shun illicit and obscene way of life. 
The effects of social media go a long way to help or mar our lives and marriages, but understanding the fact that real life trumps a contrived world - social media also goes a long way to making people have a balanced orientation about that which is most important - your family. 
#marriage #social #media #tool #TheHomeConsult #home #family #love #indept #analysis #savinghomes #happiness #achievement #motivation #inspiration

       LOVE

You are a chandelier
I am the universe
But without you
I am in darkness.

Act 💪